Tuesday, October 13, 2009


in the ICU is always an early experience. Today, I was ready to get out of Jacob's room by the shift change. It's always between 6:45-7:45 am and pm, and you can either stay in the room for the full hour or leave the ICU. It's the perfect time to escape the hospital room for an hour to eat something (since you can't have any food in the ICU) and clear your mind.
This morning I took my shower in the shower room, and realized I had another half an hour before I could get into Jacob's room again. I sat down in the main lobby of the hospital with a cup of coffee and a breakfast bar, and could see how the hospital started to wake up.
A long circling line is starting to form in the hall way. It's flu shot for the staff this morning.
The first patients start to come in to the hospital. It's mainly the kids who are coming in for scheduled surgery at this hour.
I am sitting next to this large machine with balls that are going around in a labyrinth. It's fascinating to follow the balls, and there are always kids and adults standing around following a specific ball around and around. It's very specific clinging noise when the ball falls down, and a smile spreads on my lips. This is a very familiar noise that I simpy don't want to be without. It has become part of my life.
Across from the hallway, I see Dr. E walking in to start her day. She sees me, and comes over and gives me a big bear hug, and wonders how Jacob is, we discuss flus and colds, and the movie "Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs", which Sarah and I watched yesterday. I found out it was Dr. E's favorite kid book.
I tell her that Sarah is nowadays calling Children's "the non-children hospital" after she is banned there. It gives her a good laugh!
It's time for me to go and see Jacob again. It's 7:45 am. ICU is open again for visitors. I am pretty confident that this will be a better day, and I realize that this is now my life.
Tonight, we're all home again. The MRI is postponed. Jacob's neurologist decided to wait with the MRI until Jacob (God forbid) is intubated again, and we'll do it at that time. We have had our pasta dinner, tried to blow a cotton ball over the table with a straw to Sarah's delight, got the kids their baths, and done Sarah's homework.
Now, it's time for some TV and relaxation, and then off to bed (my bed).
Good night, Maria.

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